Worthy Of Love Day 4
For those of you who are still reading...Thank you from the bottom of my heart! -Xo
I really want to share thoughts I think will make a difference in who ever reads my words so I really do put a lot of time in thinking about what I will write next. I have even made a list of ideas and for which days I would write it on, but every time I sit to write I am led by my heart to write something else. For this day, I want to tell you a story about myself and how I have come to believe I am worthy enough to change my lifestyle (diet) completely. This is actually something that I am extremely passionate about so bear with me as this post may be long ;)
During graduate school, I started suffering from severe digestive issues. Everything I would eat would make me sick and the pain was torturous. You know you are sick when even water makes you cramp. I finally went to a doctor where he told me I was a text book example of someone who had IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). He sent me home with a couple of prescriptions to take before I ate so I wouldn't be in any more pain. I must have been desperate because I followed instructions. After a couple months, I was still not getting any better so another prescription came to take along with what I was currently taking. I did my routine research to check the side effects and quickly knew this was not an option for me. For one, I couldn't drive and for the other, I was not allowed to take it with pain medicine.. Umm, nope! Something had to kill the brutal cramping spells I would have. Not to mention, I was a college student in the middle of finishing my Masters degree and had to drive over an hour every night. It was just days after that I would end up at the hospital.
It was on April 7 when I was completely overwhelmed with case analyses, stress from the other 12 hrs I was taking, and frail because I had been dealing with severe digestive issues for several months (some time before the holidays) when my body couldn't take anymore. Life would forever change for me that moment I was hooked up to IVs laying in a hospital bed realizing that this was it.. I had reached that rock bottom that so many people talk about. You think that through all the hardships in your life you face that you are at a bottom but nothing makes you see the tiny dust particles of that bottom like having your health taken from you. After the IVs filled me back up with life, I went home where the fear of food haunted me. I had one more month of graduate school to complete, and I was determined to finish it even at my all time low. May came and I graduated even though I was too sick to enjoy it.
My 98 lb 5'2 self was at a low of 67 lbs. The last time I weighed was some time before I was at the hospital. I knew that without food I couldn't survive, but when food was what was making me sick, I felt I was at a losing battle. There was 2 months I prayed to God to please let me go ahead and die. And, I will never forget the day I was flipping through the channels and the T.V. got stuck on a message Paula White was giving. She was talking about people who needed to lose weight. I was like.. nope, this has nothing to do with me I need to gain weight. But, the button on my remote was stuck. I heard her say that we all need to eat for God and to eat what He wants us to put in our bodies so we can be the best for Him that we can be in order to do what He has called us to do. I couldn't believe God sent me that message. I immediately felt so loved and unforgotten. This is the beginning of my new lifestyle that I will share in detail with you tomorrow on how I was able to trash all medicine just by what I ate.
You see, it isn't just people who are overweight that has to learn they are worthy enough to put good healthy food in their body. I had to rely completely on God to get me over the fear that food would make me sick. I had to eat for Him in order to do what He needs me to do. It took a lot of praying and I mean A LOT and several months before I felt healthy again. I like to think of graduate school as the pivotal moment in my life that changed the way I lived and caused me to start living. I believe we all can change the way we feel just by what we eat. Food is the medicine the God gives us. And, I have never felt healthier in my own skin.
I am here to tell you that you are worthy to take that first step to a healthier you! If you are struggling with weight gain or weight loss to even wanting to just to be healthier version of yourself then I challenge you to take that first step today. This is one decision you will never regret. Make your lifestyle matter to the future you!
Look for more on this tomorrow! I could talk days on this topic, but I doubt you would want to read about it for days.